Mimis kitchen magic

The original Goulash. 

Once upon a time there was one kilogram of beef goulash meat; 

it felt lonely and wanted to cuddle - therefore it asked an onion, it had always found attractive before, out for a date. They met in a bar called 'Pan'; where they ordered a shot of oil. It made them feel all crispy and sweet; hot too as the temperature had risen during their stay. Thankfully a shower of paprika powder rained down upon them; however only the addition of half a liter of soup cooled them down enough.

the date lasted for one and a half hour on low heat, in the end it only got disturbed by cream and flour who were there by coincidence. They decided to make a double date out of it; it worked better than expected. The couples kissed under the rain of salt, pepper and tomato mark - never once meeting on sole dates again.
Ps I know it is a weird way to write a recipe, but I was in the mood for a story.